The People Who Work at NES Have a Death Wish

You know those people who just love to hate their jobs?

NES Lady (“lady” used loosely):  NES?

Me: Hi, my electric bill was more than double the typical amount due to a faulty thermostat – it wasn’t registering the correct temperature and caused my heat to run constantly.  It took a week to repair, and I have documentation.  Is there any way to receive an adjustment on my bill?

NES Lady: What is the address?

Me: :::gives address:::

NES Lady: What is the name on the account?

Me: Sarah Mercer…or…it could be under Pollard. :::swallows to avoid vomiting:::

NES Lady: Did you get married?

Me: No.  I got divorced.  Please change my name on the account.  Back to the matter at hand, can you make an adjustment to my bill if I provide appropriate documentation?

NES Lady:  TVA doesn’t allow us to do that.  What temperature are you keeping the thermostat on?

Me: 74 degrees when I’m home, 70 degress when I’m not.

NES Lady: 74!?  Why so high???

Me: Pardon?  :::My mom keeps hers on 80.  Why is she acting like I’m from another planet?:::

NES Lady: We recommend you set it no higher than 68.

Me: Um, 68?!  :::Woman, I don’t own a snuggie.  Do you want me to freeze?:::

NES Lady: YOU KNOW, that’s probably why your heat runs constantly.

Me: RAN constantly…past tense.  It ran constantly because it was BROKEN…it ran until it I shut it off manually, after it was over 80 degrees and climbing in my apartment.  But now it’s fixed.

NES Lady: 68 degrees should be the absolute highest, especially to save energy…

Me: :::still flabbergasted:::  I really don’t think 74 is completely unreasonable…

NES Lady: :::still arguing with me:::  To keep it that high, it wastes SO much energy…

Me: You’re calling me wasteful?  LOOK.  I really don’t have the time nor patience to argue with you on where I should set my thermostat.  Are you saying you can make the adjustment or not?

NES Lady: No, I can’t, but…

Me: Thanks.  :::CLICK.  UGH.  I wish I could slam a cell phone:::

Really?  I’m wasting energy?  I pride myself on doing my part to conserve energy.  You don’t know me, woman!

I use paperless billing, avoid writing checks at all cost, and use scratch paper whenever possible.  I never run the dishwasher until I’m absolutely certain I can’t cram another dish in it.  I habitually turn off lights when I’m not using a particular room…Hell, sometimes I even sit in the dark.  AND I use those awful squiggly bulbs, even though they give me that slight jaundiced look when I’m putting on my makeup.  I wash clothes and linens in cold water.   I recycle…and I rebuke those who do not.   I plan to own a hybrid vehicle at some point…I would own one now, but I am poor and they are out of my budget.  I turn off the water while I’m brushing my teeth.  I carry reusable grocery bags.  AND I only buy tampons with the biodegradable applicator.  OKAY???  So back off, lady.  BACK.  OFF.

Fighting Fair?

A step-by-step guide regarding how NOT to be taken seriously in a written debate:

1. Have atrocious grammar.  How did you get past 8th grade?  Really, inquiring minds want to know. You really think someone is going to believe you are an intelligent little debater, despite your apparent confusion between “two” and “to?” Or “your” and “you’re?” You think someone is going to sit there and read your massive run-on sentence thoughtfully?  You do?  Oh ok, keep telling yourself that…

2. Forget spell check.  You know, it’s that little button marked “ABC” with a check on it…Too bad it doesn’t flag big words that happen to be spelled correctly but are used in the wrong context.  Awww, you almost faked intelligence…Nice try.

3. Reply to opponents’ arguments with name calling.  Seriously?  That’s how you plan to win someone over?  Shall I reply with, “I know you are, but what am I?”  Or maybe, “Whatever you say is rubber and glue…?”  

4. Have no clue what the facts are.  Some go around repeating everything BFI (that’s Rush Limbaugh, for those who have just tuned in) says as if it is as true as the word of God Himself.   I hope you have additional (ahem, factual) sources for your information.  If you don’t  have sufficient knowledge of the topic at hand and choose to run your mouth anyway, someone who knows better just might catch you in a gaffe…You know, like if someone asks you what Vice President of the United States does, and you reply, the VP is “in charge of the U.S. Senate, so if they want to they can really get in there with the senators and make a lot of good policy changes.”  In this example, if an intelligent, well-educated person were in earshot, his/her stupidometer would undoubtedly go off…

5. Overreact when someone asks you why you feel the way you do. Why so defensive?  You know what is easier than overreacting and will keep your blood pressure down? Answering the question – answering it thoughtfully and respectfully.  After all, it’s a question, not an accusation.

6. When challenged, change the subject. Nothing says “I don’t have a leg to stand on” like changing the subject.   However, it’s perfectly acceptable to say, “You know, I should research that a little more before I take a stance.”

7. Compare apples to oranges. Oh, how I love  a faulty analogy. :::sigh:::  Against gay marriage? Try comparing homosexuals to pedophiles. (Yeah, I really did hear this one.)  Go ahead and make absurd arguments.  That’s an AWESOME way to get people to see things from your angle.   Are you effing kidding me?    That strategy will never get you any closer to proving your point…and people will laugh at you.

8. Lack empathy.  Why do we debate? We want to be heard, right? And deep down, we hope at least one person listens and maybe considers changing his/her mind.  How can you be firm in your beliefs if you’ve never examined the topic at hand from a different point of view? More importantly, if you never try to empathize with those from the opposing viewpoint, how can you expect them to trust and respect you?  You have to find common ground; empathy is necessary to do so.

9. Blatantly show that you’re certain your opinion is the only opinion that matters. Just as you want to be heard, the other side wants to be heard. It’s hard to listen when you’re hogging the podium.  (Above:  note the appropriate usage of “your” and “you’re,”  and refer back to #1.)

10. Choose to remain ignorant. Ahhhh, the coward’s way out. Fine. Stay in your own little world. Don’t learn anything new.  What a boring existence?

So I’ve  gotten a little charged up over the last several days when “discussing” some current events/issues – most recently, equal access to marriage.  (I’ll save that specific topic for another blog…)  Anywho, at various times in these numerous discussions, I encountered all of the above.  Sometimes I’m not sure why I try to reason with the unreasonable, speak intelligently with the unintelligent, talk facts with those who have only opinions, or attempt to enlighten those who would rather stay in the dark.  Ah, well…I guess I survived another day of running into brick walls.  Dense, mindless, stubborn brick walls.

I’m Going Rogue.

CNN confirms: “Palin has signed a deal with Fox News to appear as a ‘contributor’ on the network.”   What does that even mean?  CNN apparently didn’t think it was necessary to elaborate on the said role of ‘contributor.’  (I cannot imagine why…)  Fox News, however, stated Palin would “offer her political commentary and analysis across all Fox News platforms.”  Really???  Shall we revisit the Katie Couric interviews?  I hope she’s brushed up on her “political readings” (whatever they are…maybe she can at least name a few by now…) over the last year.  Barf.  I would throw up in my mouth at the very thought of seeing this woman continue to grace my television screen over and over, but…A. puking over the mere disgust generated by this idea is not worth the loss of nutrients, and B. who cares?  I mean, everyone knows the very notion that *I* would voluntarily watch Fox News is laughable.

I’m gonna choose to look on the bright side:

More opportunities to make fun of her.  I mean, SNL has certainly had a lack of comedic material since the election came to a close.  This is like manna from Heaven, comedy made easy.  Of course, I still don’t plan to tune into Fox; I’d rather watch John Stewart give me the “highlights”  – double the comedy!

New drinking games.  Think about how schnockered everyone will be if they have to drink every time Caribou Barbie (“CB,” for short) says “You betcha” or becomes stumped and retreats to a long moment of :::duh::: silence (which Fox will no doubt blame on a technical difficulty or broadcast delay)…Oh the shenanigans!

A bright new career for CB. I’m certain her incredible insight on foreign policy and limitless knowledge across the board on other political matters will…BWAhahahahah!  Sorry, I just really couldn’t get through that with a straight face.   Let’s be serious. Several  moderates and most (if not all) left-leaners, progressives, extreme liberals, etc. already don’t take her seriously, and this will just further solidify their sentiments. So what does she stand to gain? Expansion of her fan base to include more people who are even bigger brain-dead idiots than her current fans don’t realize she has no idea what she’s talking about most of the time?  Ratings for Fox? Well, if that’s the goal, I have no doubt she’ll succeed.  Seriously, she’s better suited for TV than running the country – TV places  far more importance on looks than knowledge.  She’ll be just fine.  I’m betting the RNC will just have to find another stooge for 2012.  It’s almost a shame… 

And by all means, let’s talk about “fair and balanced.”  I’m fair and balanced.  I’m an equal opportunity offender; no one is safe.  Take that, Fox News.

Whoops.

Wow.  I owe you all an apology: It’s been over two months since my last blog .  I know, I know – unacceptable.  Hmmm…I think an update is in order?

Since my last blog, I have fallen fast and hard (That’s what she said!  Sorry, couldn’t resist…) for this guy:

Raaaawwwwwwwwwwwr!!!

Ain’t he cute?  BWAHahahahaha! 

Anywho, when I was in 8th grade at Ezell Harding, my gal pal had this smokin’ hot older brother (Joe, a senior in high school), who happened to be one of three P.E. aids for our class.  And I just happened to drool over  him…Every.  Single.  Day.   He was dreamy.  Well, he graduated, and I went back to the public school system.  Fast forward thirteen – count ‘em,  thirteen – years…

I get a friend request on Facebook.  :::squealing aloud in classic schoolgirl fashion:::  I quickly confirm (of course), and  I then spend 30 minutes or so forming the perfect, exquisitely worded two sentence message in response.  We emailed several times, exchanged phone numbers, text-flirted, etc.,  and after several dropped hints…

:::HELLO???   FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, ASK ME OUT.  I’M INTERESTED.  CAN I BE ANY MORE OBVIOUS? I’M VERY INTERESTED.   EXTREMELY INTERESTED.::: 

…we went out on our first date and have been inseparable ever since.  I mean, honestly, if I knew guys like this existed (and there aren’t many…well, only one just like this, naturally), I would have been on the train leaving Loserville a long time ago.  I’m so thankful we found each other.

I left out a very important piece of information: Joey’s in the military.  That’s right, I fell for an amazing guy who happened to have a  crew cut.  Moving on… The entire time we’ve dated, we’ve known our time together (in the near future, at least) was scarce; Joey would be deploying Iraq with the Army National Guard for a year in just a few short months.  So how did we handle that?  1.  We cherished every second we had until he left.  2.  We set up 2010 to go by as quickly as possible – work, school, books, movies, friends, and…Skype.  Ahhhhh, Skype.

Right now, he is in New Jersey awaiting deployment, returning somewhere between Christmas of this year and Valentine’s Day of 2011 with 15 days of leave this summer.  At some point during his leave, I’ll be whisked away to a far away place to meet him – somewhere beautiful and romantic.  :::sigh:::  I’ll send you a postcard.  I laughed as I wrote that…as if I’ll have time to write and send you people post cards…     

On a serious note, do send your thoughts and prayers with us during this time – with him for his safety and with his family and I because…well, we miss him.  A lot.

Come home soon!

All My Single Ladies

Lately, it seems the topics of man-hunting and ticking biological clocks have dominated some of the conversations of a few of my gal pals.  (Don’t worry; I wouldn’t dream of mentioning any names.)  I have had various periods of singlehood in the past, but this time  around I am older and wiser; therefore, my outlook is very different.   

I’m suddenly feeling sage-like, and I’d like to share a few things I feel I know for certain.  Take note!  :)  

You can’t hurry love.

Most of us want to find that special companion – the one who makes us laugh, the one we’d call when we’ve had a bad day, the one we miss when he/she’s not around, etc.   Why make plans and timelines for things such as this, especially when the timing is kinda out of our control?  That person will come along in due time.  Let go of the pressure; it’s okay to be alone, and furthermore, it’s okay to enjoy it.  Use this time to meet new people.  Rekindle old friendships.  Try new things.  Get comfortable alone in the silence once in a while.   Besides, it’s been my experience the best things come along when I’m not necessarily looking for them, which leads to my next little nugget…

Don’t let life pass you by. 

Did you ever want something so badly – ever get so obsessed over some goal – that you came down with a bad case of  tunnel vision?  There’s no telling what you missed while you were fixated on that one thing – no telling what opportunity passed you by because it was inconvenient, unexpected, and/or didn’t fit into your plan.  Be open to the really awesome things (and people) that may come along when you least expect them.  Life is short, and if you wait for the perfect time to take advantage of a good thing, you’ll wait forever. 

Be comfortable in your own skin. 

We’re all different.  Own what is yours – good and bad.  Take me, for example:  

  1.  I’m awkward.  A lot.  I create and thrive on awkward moments.
  2. Also contributing to #1, I’m a complete klutz – If I can trip over it, break it, knock it over, run into it…I will.  I mean it.  At no time and in no realistic capacity will you ever hear “Sarah” and “grace” used in the same sentence. You want proof?  Monday, I ran into a table.  And I don’t mean I grazed it, nor did I bump it.  I mean, I nearly knocked it over…with people sitting there.  My customers asked if I had too many shift shots on my birthday.  Me?  BWAhahaha!  Shift shots??  Are you kidding???  I’m a walking-disaster sober, so drinking on the job would be just plain dangerous. 
  3. I’m an awful driver.
  4. I have no sense of direction, which doesn’t help with #3.
  5. I’m a neat-freak.  I can’t relax when things are out of place.
  6. I snort when I laugh.
  7. I hate most vegetables.
  8. My extended family is kinda nuts.  Okay, that was a lie.  They fall more into the “batsh*t-crazy-nuts” category.
  9. I’m a nerd.  Okay, fair enough.  Some might find that attractive.
  10. I’m honest to a fault.  How is that a fault, you ask?

Friend: “Does this make me look fat?”
Me: “No.  It makes you look pregnant.”

Apparently, some don’t appreciate brutal honestly.

See, we all have flaws.  I prefer to call them “quirks.”  I also like to think said “quirks” are offset by my better qualities:

  1. I’m smart.  I have not-so-common sense and am educated.  Hey, that’s hard to come by, yes?
  2. I am an excellent cook.   Mmmmmm…chocolate chip cookies…
  3. I’m not an ogre, right?
  4. I have compassion for others.   I believe in giving what I am able, even if it’s just time.
  5. I have mastered the artform of kissing.
  6. I’m passionate about everything that’s important to me – family, friends, education, career, contributing to the world around me… 
  7. I like sports.  (I should clarify that statement: I like to watch sports.  Do we need to revist the subject of my complete lack of physical coordination?)
  8. I’m talented and artistic.  (You should see my mad design skills, yo.) 
  9. I’m sane.  That seems to be very important these days.
  10. I know who I am and what I want.  That’s quite possibly the most important trait one can possess.

In this very superficial world in which we live, I know what really matters, and I know what I have offer.  Do you know what you have to offer?  If you do, people will take notice, and you will become instantly more attractive to them.  If you embrace and love who you are – flaws…er…quirks and all, chances are someone is bound to do the same.  Just wait patiently for that to happen, and don’t sell yourself short in the meantime.

PS:
These thoughts seemed to be solidified one Sunday as I sat alone on my couch in only my underwear and Titans jersey for the majority of the day, and I had three revelations:

  1. The Titans make me very angry.
  2. I have a slight cursing problem.  (See #1.)
  3. Dang, one day I’m gonna make some lucky guy very happy.   =)

(I know, a feel good advice blog?  Oh Yes.  Really.)

Obama to be Awarded Nobel Peace Prize…

All this bullsh*t I’ve heard all day about the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize?  Grrr.

Americans want action, not effort. 

The Nobel Prize honors achievements in physics, chemistry, medicine, literature, and (I’m quoting here) “work in peace.”   (It’s hard to measure success in peace, people.)  In his will, Alfred Nobel laid out the parameters for the how the recipients are chosen.  Specifically, a committee of five persons elected by the Norwegian Parliament choose the annual recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize.  So…FYI,  AMERICANS didn’t give him the award, and he for damn sure didn’t give the f*cking award to himself.   Give the guy a break.   

Hitler was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, too.

If you’re deluded enough to believe that, kindly take a long walk off a short pier – your superior intellect is obviously not serving as a contribution to society.  It’s painful for me to think  any of you are that stupid.  If you’re going to go spouting off stuff like that, have enough sense to check it out first.  The truth is Hitler was never awarded a Nobel Prize; he was merely nominated in 1939.   Keep in mind, each year the Nobel Committees send individual invitations to members of academies, university professors, scientists, previous Laureates, etc., asking them to submit nominees.   It’s possible for almost anyone to be nominated.  The committee can then accept or reject the nomination, but in Hitler’s case, the nomination was withdrawn.

Obama doesn’t deserve it.

Obama was cited as being granted the award for his “extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples.”  I can cite a few examples if you’d like:  He canceled the missile-shield system in Eastern Europe that had pissed off Russia.  He also made the decision to negotiate with Iran over the issue of nuclear (maybe a few of you are more comfortable with “nuculer”) program.  Yes, I call this type of “move” the transition from demand by the United States (aka the “World Police”) to peaceful negotiation.   He’s traveled to the Middle East to try and mend our relationships with the Muslim countries who hate our guts  – countries who thought of George W. Bush as a criminal (and idiot).  His efforts to spur on foreign diplomacy have not gone completely unnoticed in my book, and apparently, other nations too have gained respect and admiration for our leader.  Let’s not treat that like such a bad thing, okay?  Are there people out there more deserving?  Maybe – Most humanitarians’ deeds go without thanks every day.  

Everyone’s entitled to his own opinion, but I can guarandamntee you haven’t heard of the majority of the previous  Laureates, much less know what they accomplished.  So exactly why do you care all of a sudden? What’s wrong?  Never won a medal on Field Day?  Didn’t win 1st place in the talent show?   Picked last in kickball?  You’re big boys and girls, so quit your b*tching.   Here’s a notion: Stop complaining about what others are/aren’t doing…Stop saying “he’s gettin’ somethin’ I ain’t gettin’”…And make your own mark.

Congress Holds Pep Rally, Go Team.

I’ve already touched on most of what was said in the address last night, but I do want to highlight a great point – Hmmmm…Here we have all these publically funded colleges, yet Harvard and Yale are still in business.  Curious, isn’t it?  This is what I’ve been screamin’ all along.  And oh horrors, publically funded “socialist” programs!  Oh yeah…You mean, like public schooling?  And VA hospitals?  The post office?  Parks? Libraries?  And the military?  Yeah, those are all totally useless.  Feel free to boycott peaceably in protest.  Morons.

Anyway, you all know my plea to you: Get informed.  Figure out where you stand.  Spread truth, not lies.  If you don’t know what you’re talking about, best to keep your mouth shut.  Hopefully, you realize that I get so into politics because I am a responsible citizen and like to be informed, and I like others to be informed as well.  I don’t care if you agree with me.  I don’t care if I make you mad or hurt your feelings (of course, not where my forum is concerned anyway).  My hope is you learn something by reading, but I’m also okay with you getting mad enough to start caring… If you wanna make it your life’s mission to dig up something that proves me wrong, awesome.  At least you’re using your brain.  So…assuming you already received the above message, this blog’s really not a message to you…

And, surprisingly enough…brace yourselves….wait for it….I don’t have much to say about yesterday’s address to joint congress regarding health care, except this:

President Obama: “We should remain open to other ideas that accomplish our ultimate goal …We should work together to address any legitimate claims you may have.”

Translation: You were elected to do a job.  Do it. 

It’s our elected officials who have really chapped my ass here…as if they’d be on my reading list, haha.  You know what? This was a presidential address, not a pep rally.  You don’t stand and cheer so much that the man can’t get through what he has to say.  You don’t boo and shout insults at the “other team.”  F*cking grow up.  It’s your job to read the bills put before you.  It’s your job to vote against the bills with which you don’t agree, and vote in favor of the ones with which you do agree.  It’s your job to be a liason to the public – especially the uninformed public.  Scare tactics  are not an option.  What you should be doing is presenting ideas that will work if you think the ones before you won’t.  This is not jury duty; gridlocks are not acceptable.  It’s your job to work relentlessly and efficiently with the “other side” until things  get done.  Period.  Clock is ticking. 

P.S. “Kudos” to the Prez for having balls of stainless steel to call out those who spread venomous lies.  :)   I imagine this is what Marie found so attractive – big stainless steel balls.

Education, Yeah it’s kinda important…

You know what I just can’t effing stand?  I can’t stand for people to take something good and bastardize it until it appears to be something completely different.  Are they just so miserable that they have to FIND something wrong with everything

Most of you know that tomorrow President Obama will address the nation’s students regarding the value of education.   I’ve heard a lot of arguments as to why this address is so wrong, and I guess I just still don’t “get it.”

Argument #1: Republican officials (a.k.a. Fox News) have suggested the Obama administration plans to use this address to promote the “liberal socialist agenda.” 

Um.  I really have no words.  
http://www.whitehouse.gov/MediaResources/PreparedSchoolRemarks/
Read it.  Find the liberal socialist indoctrination, please.  Really.  Because I couldn’t.

“I’ve talked a lot about your government’s responsibility for setting high standards, supporting teachers and principals, and turning around schools that aren’t working where students aren’t getting the opportunities they deserve.” 
Translation: All students deserve access to a good education=socialism?

Just another bastardized message…  If you read this address and make a  similar connection, I’ll have to say – I think you are seriously deluded, and I would be delighted to give you the number of a qualified psychotherapist.  

Argument #2: Republican officials remind us that Ronald Reagan and George H. W. Bush gave similar addresses, and the hypocritical democrats threw a fit. (Don’t look at me; I was 5 in 1988.)

First of all, understand that both addresses mentioned above were delivered smack dab in the middle of election campaigns; therefore, it is understandable that the intent of these messages was questioned. 

  • In 1988, when Reagan gave his address to young students, George H. W. Bush was running against Michael Dukakis. Reagan surely would not have wanted the White House turned back over to the Democratic Party, and unlike Obama’s speech outlined above (you read it, yes?), right-wing rhetoric pervaded Reagan’s speech - specifically matters of foreign policy, lower taxes, and smaller government.  He encouraged students to “ground [themselves] in the ideas and values of the American Revolution.”  See the entire video below:
    http://gothamschools.org/2009/09/04/from-the-archives-ronald-reagans-1988-speech-to-students/
  • In 1991, George H.W. Bush was gearing up for his second run (against Bill Clinton in 1992), and he also gave an address to the nation’s students.  Like Reagan, his timing (on the eve of this important election) was controversial, and he did interject a line regarding his proposed education plan (“National Education Goals”).  Aside from that, from an objective standpoint, I can’t say I found a great deal wrong with his words to young people.  I was unable to find  the full video, but the speech’s text can be found below:
    http://bushlibrary.tamu.edu/research/public_papers.php?id=3450&year=1991&month=10

Argument #3: Some parents don’t want their kids watching the address at all, much less without their supervision.

Okay, maybe you want to watch it with them.  Or maybe you don’t want them watching it at all.  Maybe because you despise the man.  Maybe because you don’t know what the address will include because…well…you’re just too lazy to read the outline.  A.  He’s President of the United States, so…he kind of has the right to address the public whenever he sees fit, about whatever he sees fit.  This is the very argument ALL you Bush fans (if you’re reading) would have used (and did use) during the past 8 years…”He’s President; have some respect.”  I’d like to know…Would any of you have had a problem with teachers flipping on the TV for students to watch Ronald Reagan’s inaugural address or George W. Bush’s address to the nation in the aftermath of September 11th?   B.  If the message inspires kids to do better – teaches them to work hard – instills in them the value of a good education – gives them self-worth…I don’t care who delivers the message – Mother Theresa, Ghandi, yes even Sarah Palin (and I loathe her).   You know what though?  Forget all that.  This is what I would like you to think about: Not all kids have parents like you.  Some kids have no one to cheer them on.  Some kids have no one to give them hope.  Quit your b*tchin’ - And let them hear it. 

The address will air Tuesday, September 8, 11 am CST on CSPAN and on the official White House website.

Douchebags On Parade

It is official – The Vandy kids are back at school.

So tonight I was hostessing at the restaurant, and I had the following conversation…if you can call it a “conversation.”  I mean, my understanding is that a conversation requires two people to be present.  

Hint: It helps to imagine the Douchebag end of the dialog in a voice that reflects the epitome of dumb-as-a-box-of-rocks fratboy douchebaggery…

 Douchebag: :::walks into restaurant and continues past me:::

 Me: Do you need a table for dinner?

 Douchebag: Uh, we’re  just going upstairs…

 Me: Do you need a table…UPSTAIRS?

 Douchebag: Ummm…yeah, I guess.

 Me: How many are in your party?

 Douchebag: Like 6. Or 8. Or something.

 Me: Okay, well I don’t have any tables available upstairs right now. Do you want me to add you to the wait list?

 Douchebag: Uh, no. We’ll just go upstairs.

 Me: Really, there’s nowhere for you to sit…UPSTAIRS. :::ok, really…how much did your daddy have to donate to Vandy to get you in?:::

Douchebag: Oh. Well, we’ll just go upstairs. To the bar.

Me: :::deep breath::: Just so you know, there aren’t 6-8 seats open at the bar.

Douchebag: Oh. Well…can we get a table?

Me: I have tables down here available now, or you can wait for one upstairs.

:::crickets:::

Me: Do you want to sit down here or upstairs?

Douchebag: Upstairs.

Me: Let me put you on the list.

Douchebag: There’s a wait?

Me: :::nodding, with wide “oh, for the love of Jehovah” eyes:::

Douchebag: Well, we’ll just go upstairs…er…to the bar.

Me: :::seeing this is obviously a lost cause::: Okay. If you decide you need a TABLE, just come back down here and put your name on our wait list….

:::two minutes later:::

Manager: Sarah, there’s a big group of people upstairs who are asking for a table.

Me: Shocker……..

 And it was like that all night…One. Moron. After. Another. And I can’t tell you how many times I said, “Um…’Scuse me…You can’t leave here with that beer” and watched as numerous sororitutes, in timeless, classy form, downed their beers before stumbling into their cabs…

Disclaimer: None of the people mentioned in this blog are to be equated to my very dear friends who happen to be Vandy students or Vandy alumni, nor confused with those who at some point joined a sorority or fraternity (ahem, Allen…).   Apparently, I don’t consider you douchebags…because…well, I’m not friends with douchebags.

Obama [s]Care, Summary

Rumor #7: Our System Doesn’t Need Reform, akin to “If it ain’t broke, it don’t need fixin.’” 

FALSE: Of course it does, unless you don’t have issues with any of the following… 

Cost: Contrary to popular belief, our health care system is one of the most expensive in the industrialized world, yet one of the least effective.

Access to Coverage: Currently Americans have three options for health care coverage – private insurance (employer-provided or independent, which many cannot afford), Medicaid (for which most do not qualify because their income is too high), and Medicare. I am a member of the middle class whose employer does not provide insurance. For me – a healthy 26 year-old with no pre-existing conditions – health/dental insurance (sh*tty insurance, mind you) is approximately $160/month.

Yearly Medical Expenses
  With Insurance Without Insurance
Insurance Premiums $1,920 $0
My Prescriptions $180 $396
Sick Office Visit $30 $200
***Prescriptions Resulting from Above $15 $65
Peek-and-Poke Exam $30 $240
Routine Dental Cleanings/Exams $144 $240
Total $2,319 $1,141

Let’s do the math: Assuming I remain fairly healthy in a 12 month period, my medical expenses would total approximately $2,319 in an average year, including my cost of insurance. Keep in mind, should I become very ill unexpectedly, this insurance policy carries an annual deductible of a whopping $3,500. (Sure, I’d just write a check for that…Ha!) Being the responsible individual I am, I opt to fork out the $2,319, but many people in my situation, using the same reasoning I just explained, opt to go without insurance and take their chances, saving over $1000 per year – or more if they never go for a doctor’s visit. And for some, it’s not a matter of reasoning – they simply cannot afford it. I reiterate what I said in an earlier post – 46 million uninsured…Hello???

Emergency Room Overload: Many times, the uninsured wait to seek treatment until they become very ill – at this point, they wind up in the ER. People who are sick and don’t have health insurance end up in ERs because ERs are required to treat them, while primary care physicians may refuse treatment because of their inability to pay.  The amount of funding required to keep these facilities operating as they should is not available, due to the amount of patients unable to pay for the care they are receiving. Some specialists avoid ER duty all together because of the growing number of patients who can’t pay.  As a result of the sick and uninsured population, ERs are now overcrowded and understaffed, thus providing sub par care.

Bankruptcy: As I previously mentioned, approximately 60% of bankruptcies are filed due to medical bills, and about 75% of these people have insurance at the time they incur these medical expenses. I blame questionable ethics – common practices of private insurance companies who merely want to make a buck. These practices have gone unregulated long enough.

Job Loss=Loss of Insurance: This is pretty self-explanatory. In the current job market, people are more scared than ever of losing their jobs, and most will lose their health insurance if they become unemployed. This brings us to the next point…

Pre-Existing Conditions: A pre-existing condition is any medical condition that a person has at any point before day one of his/her insurance coverage. If you had an accident before your coverage took effect, and that accident resulted in an illness that wasn’t discovered until after your coverage started, that could be considered pre-existing. If you have a congenital defect that wasn’t discovered until after your coverage began, that could be considered pre-existing. Other examples can range from diabetes to cancer. Coverage is limited or excluded for pre-existing conditions. Sometimes these exclusions apply when you decide to change insurance policies (i.e. change in jobs=change in insurance policy); other times the exclusion applies when you have a lapse in coverage for more than 63 days (i.e. If you were laid off and it took you six months to find a new job, and you couldn’t afford COBRA during that period of time or couldn’t find an independent insurance provider that would cover you…this period of time would be considered a lapse in coverage).

Limits: Private insurance companies have annual and lifetime maximums. Once you exceed these limits, you are 100% responsible for any medical expenses you incur beyond that cap. You may not worry about this right now, but if you were to come down with a life-threatening illness like heart failure or cancer, it would be very easy to rack up enough bills to exceed the amount your insurance company is obligated to pay.

I could come up with more, but frankly I’m tired of writing, and you’re tired of reading…Our current system is riddled with problems that are screaming to be addressed. My biggest concerns?

  •  The amount of people uninsured, especially those in need of medical care. Right now they cannot get the necessary attention until they are sick enough to be admitted to an ER. How simple and inexpensive might their illnesses have been to treat in the early stages?  This is why I support a public option.  People should not go broke because they get sick, and people shouldn’t stay sick because they can’t afford to go broke.
  •  The unregulated practices of the private insurance companies. Sure, have some health insurance…You’re covered…You know, unless you get really sick…Then you’re on your own.  Why the hell have insurance at all if it doesn’t do what it’s designed to do?  If it doesn’t come through when it really counts?…When. You’re. Sick.  I support goverment oversight of the practices of private insurance companies.   Private insurance companies will have an opportunity to change their practices and compete with the public option.  If they choose not to do so, eh.  What can ya do?

Most of you reading may be a little out of touch with our problematic health care system, since you are young and healthy and don’t worry about much more than the occasional cold…as John Stewart put it, his insurance plan when he was younger was called “Tylenol PM and Colt 45.”  However, people on both sides of the aisle have admitted that our current system is unsustainable at the rate it’s going; therefore, we need either a new system or drastic reform.  Even if you disagree with the part of this bill that introduces a public option, at the very least consider the other problems the bill attempts to address.  And for crying out loud, don’t go repeating everything you hear.   If you make a conscious choice to pass along the ridiculous oral diarrhea of people like Sarah Palin and BFI the scare tactics of those who don’t support health care reform without actually thinking for yourself, you do nothing but contribute to the rumormill.  Information  -  factual information –  is available to you…Use your brains, then decide where you stand. 

 

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